Porch and patio furniture removal around the Minneapolis lakes

The short answer

The minimum is $75 per visit, so two patio chairs at $30 each ($60) still bills at $75 — worth adding the grill while the truck is there.

Worked example: patio table $89 + four patio chairs at $30 each ($120) = $209.

Why lake-area outdoor furniture wears out on a schedule

The homes around Bde Maka Ska, Lake Harriet, Lake of the Isles, Cedar Lake and Lake Nokomis — and out along Minnehaha Creek through Tangletown and Fuller — are built around the outdoors in a way the rest of the housing stock is not. Big front porches facing the parkway, screened porches on the back, decks, and in a lot of the older Linden Hills and Kenwood houses a three-season room that is genuinely three-season.

All of that furniture gets used hard for about five months and then has to survive seven. And most of it does not get brought in, because there is nowhere to put it — a single-stall alley garage already has the snowblower in it by November.

So it sits out. Aluminum frames pit, cushions hold water and freeze, resin wicker goes brittle and cracks in the cold, and the fabric on a sling chair lets go after a few cycles. Five years is a good run.

The two moments this gets dealt with

Late April and May. Everything comes out from wherever it was stored, or gets uncovered, and the damage from the winter is visible for the first time. The cushions that were left under a tarp are ruined. Two of the six chairs are cracked. This is when most lake-area porch furniture gets replaced, and the old set has to go somewhere in the same week the new one is delivered.

October. The reverse. Everything comes in, and what will not fit in the garage or the basement gets a decision made about it. This is the better month to book, because you are not competing with the whole city's spring clear-out.

Either way, the price is the same. There is no seasonal pricing and no surcharge for outdoor work.

Screened porches and the access problem

The characteristic Minneapolis screened porch is on the back or the side of the house, reached through the house or down a short exterior stair, and it is where the wicker and the old porch swing live.

Getting furniture out of one is usually straightforward, with two recurring wrinkles. The first is that the screen door is narrower than the furniture that went in — plenty of porch sets were carried in before the screens went on, or assembled in place. The second is that the path out runs through the house, because the porch does not have its own route to the alley.

Neither costs extra. There is no long-carry fee and no charge for taking something apart. But mention it when you book so the crew brings tools and floor protection for the route through the house.

Front porches on the parkway

The houses facing the Grand Rounds parkways and the lake streets have deep open front porches, which creates a specific and slightly awkward situation: your discarded furniture is on display to a very well-used walking and cycling route.

That is genuinely why people call rather than stage things outside for a week. A cracked resin set stacked on a front porch on a lake parkway is visible to a few thousand people a day, and in the tighter blocks around Linden Hills and Lynnhurst the neighbors notice.

Two practical notes for these addresses. Parking on the parkway side is often restricted or heavily used, so the truck usually works from the street behind or the alley — no charge for the longer carry. And the boulevard between the sidewalk and the street is not a place to stage furniture; anything left there reads as illegal dumping regardless of intent.

What usually goes together

Outdoor clear-outs are rarely one item. Real combinations with the addition shown:

• Deck set replaced in Linden Hills. Patio table $89 + six patio chairs at $30 each ($180) = $269.
• Back deck cleared in Lynnhurst. Hot tub $322 + patio table $89 + four patio chairs at $30 each ($120) = $531.
• Screened porch in Tangletown. Chaise lounge $93 + two patio chairs at $30 each ($60) + large area rug $68 = $221.
• End of summer in Nokomis. Above-ground pool frame and liner $145 + propane grill $71 + charcoal grill $59 = $275.
• Small job, one visit. Two patio chairs at $30 each ($60) is under the $75 minimum, so it bills at $75. Add the grill at $71 and you are at $60 + $71 = $131.

If it is a whole yard and deck, compare against a quarter truck at $241 or a half at $431 — you get quoted both and pay the lower.

What to do before the crew arrives

• Take the propane cylinder off the grill. The grill goes in the truck at $71; the tank does not. It goes to an exchange point.
• Empty the cushions out. Waterlogged cushions that have been through a freeze weigh far more than they look and hold a remarkable amount of water. Let them drain on the deck if you can.
• Drain anything that holds water. An above-ground pool, a planter, a cooler. In spring these are full and in October they are half frozen.
• Check the gate. The route from the back deck to the alley in these narrow lots usually runs through a side gate. If it is latched, warped or frozen, sort it before the day.

Everything else is fine as it sits. There is no charge for disassembly, no stair charge and no fee for the walk from the back of the lot.

Frequently asked questions